Military Funny songs / jokes

[Hellkite]

""Though I Fly Through the Valley of Death, I Shall Fear No Evil. For I am at 80,000 Feet and Climbing.""

Nope



​

 

[Hath]

LOL I like it!

this one so goes with your last post

 

[Hath]

They should have got a Marine. He would have volunteered and at least brought a SAW with him.

 

[Hellkite]

Well given that the Army used pop up target on ranges " more combat like " than (USMC) static targets on theirs So the Army are more likely to hit what they are firing at.

Ask frog or Scififan both are Army vets

@CrazyFrog1903
@SciFiFan

 

[Hath]

Considering the dude in the pic doesn't look like he has a mag in his gun I'll take 200 rds of spray and pray lol

 

[Hellkite]

I'd take the 30×173 mmGAU-8/A Avenger autocannon that is on that A10 c in the pic over a A SAW any day

 

[Hath]

Me too!



Although you can't pickle the main gun off like you could a marine or a pain in the ass hath.

 

[Hellkite]

You know the F-35 has it in a / an gun pod right

 

[Hath]

No I did not know that. Did they not include a gun on the f-35? Is it like the gattling gun pod of the old F4 phatom? Or just an add on for more fire power?

 

[Hellkite]

the F-35A variant {Airforce model } has a GAU-22/A rotary cannon mounted internally near the left wing root

But F-35B {Marine Corps variant } and F-35C {Navy variant} have no internal gun and instead can use a Terma A/S multi-mission pod (MMP) carrying the GAU-22/A

 

[Hath]

Marines hard at work?

 

[Hath]

Navy Humor..

One day, a Navy Chief went to the Officer's Club with his Captain to eat
lunch. When they entered the main dining room, they found the place was
quite crowded. They did notice three Lieutenants sitting at a table with
two empty chairs, so the Captain asked them if they could join them.

They promptly invited them to join them. They ordered lunch and joined
them in conversation as they ate. At one point, the chief mentioned
that he had observed characteristics about many officers from which he
could determine the source of their commissioning. The Lieutenants were
eager to hear about this and asked if he could tell how each of them had
been commissioned.

The Chief turned to the Lieutenant on his left and said he went through
ROTC. The Lieutenant confirmed that was correct and asked how he had
noted this. The Chief replied that the Lieutenant, through his
conversation, seemed to have a strong academic background but limited
military experience.

The Chief then told the Lieutenant on his right that he had gone through
OCS with previous enlisted service. The Lieutenant confirmed that this
was correct and also asked how he had determined this. The Chief said,
again through his conversation, that the Lieutenant seemed to have a
firm military background and a lot of common sense.

The Lieutenant across the table from the Chief asked if he had
determined his source of commission. The Chief replied that the
Lieutenant had graduated from the United States Naval Academy. The
Lieutenant stated that was correct and asked if he had noticed his high
level of intelligence, precise military bearing, or other superior
qualities acquired at the United States Naval Academy.

The Chief replied that it was none of these that led to his
determination. He had simply observed the Lieutenant's class
ring whilehe was picking his nose.

You can't take Navy Chiefs any where.

 

[Hath]

A grizzled old E-9 Navy Chief and an old Marine Master
Gunny Sgt. were sitting at the VFW arguing about who had the tougher career.

I did 30 years in the Corps, the Marine declared proudly, and fought in three of my country's wars. Fresh out of boot camp, I hit the beach's from Tarawa to Okinawa, clawed my way up the blood-soaked sands, took out entire enemy machine gun nests, and fought hand to hand. As a sergeant, I fought in Korea
under General MacArthur. We pushed the enemy inch by bloody inch all the way
up to the Chinese border, always under a barrage of artillery and small arms
fire. Finally, as a gunny sergeant, I did three consecutive combat tours in Vietnam.
We humped through the mud and elephant grass for 14 hours a day, plagued by
rain and mosquitoes, ducking under sniper fire by day and mortar fire all night. In a
firefight, we'd fire until our arms ached and our guns were empty, then we charged
the enemy with bayonets.





"You're lucky!" said the Sailor with envy. "All shore duty, huh?"

 

[Mike Davis]

OK

Q. What is the difference between a Navy Wife and a Porshe?
A. Not everyone has been in a Porshe

Q. Do you know why the Navy deploys for 9 months and the Army for only 6?
A. That way all of their kids are not so darn Ugly.

Q. How many marines does it take to screw in a lightbulb??
A. No one knows, it has never been successfully done.

The Military has a very hard time working together because they do not even speak the same language. The work "SECURE" for instance.
Tell the Army to secure a building, they will surround it with a division and back up artillery support.
Tell the Navy to Secure a building, they will get 10 4" mooring lines, then tie it down so that not even a hurricane can blow it away.
Tell the Marines to secure a building, they will hit it hard, fast, be in the building and hold it to the end of time, nothing going in or out.
Tell the Air force to Secure a building, and they will go through GAO and take out a ten-year lease on it.
Tell the Coast Guard to Secure a building, and they will steal it and hide it away for later trades.

US Army Airborne School is three weeks long.
The first week divides the men from the boys.
The second week divides the men form the idiots,
The third week they take all of the idiots out to jump from a perfectly good airplane.